back in february, i had a week's time up in toronto on work-related matters. i managed to take a few pictures of toronto's waterfront, of which i've posted and made a strange essay covering this transitional time where the waterfront's old instrustrial roots are changing. hopefully, it's not overly didactic and makes a few licks of sense, but the amount of discussion and planning involved on making lake ontario accessible and habitable for everyone has been demanding, especially in recent history.

otherwise, i've given up on apologizing on the lack of updates. i'm more than happy to plod away with my own chores elsewhere, but you'll know when exciting news happens. film at eleven.

post-SARS, toronto is starting to shake off its leper image on the world stage. there are many discounts being offered right now within hogtown, including free flights to toronto from newark, montréal and ottawa, which a few people have pointed out to me.

if i were ever to live in toronto again, i'd make an effort to live on toronto island, otherwise known as centre island. currently a ferry ride away from the quays (although plans are afoot to finally make a bridge), centre island is primarily a park, but it's also a little community of regulated housing. the provincial tories doesn't like the idea of residences on their land and are looking at ways of kicking people off. naturally, most people find this rather pigheaded since the houses are in one little area and they're heavily regulated. a home would be purchased at a fixed price and you can do whatever you want to it but if you decide to leave, it's sold back at roughly the same price (inflation kicks in).

the bad news is there's a waiting list to live on the centre island (and no waiting list to go on that list of 500) which goes on for years. as well, you have to spend 7 months of each year living on the island to be considered. the list will be under review again in june, but i would be a write-off for a long time.

that said, i always find it difficult a cop-out to go back to where i lived before. i consider repetition punishment and a failure of sorts. although all the wondrous aspects of the life i led before are cherished deeply, i'm always compelled to find something new and not do what i necessarily did before. then again, it's nice to know when the high wire act fails, there's a fallback position. i'll need to get back to see toronto at some point, although i think denver and helsinki call stronger right now. and the pull of the new.

...but any of this hokum will be many years in the future. new york's all right with me. for now. one street smells like garbage, the other smells like candy.

this is a quick message back to canada, based on the increasingly worrysome conversations i've had as of late.

apparently, the itty bitty war in iraq is the major focus right now, so there are currently no word about the freakishly contagious and lethal SARS that's going locking down southeast asia and imperiling toronto.

however, based on its current spread rate, it will only be a matter of time before it goes from international oddity item on the back page to full-scale there's white anthrax powder on my envelopes mayhem. but i've been hearing about this for a week and people need to be aware of this disease. the paranoia, the quarantines, the fact that people need to wear face masks (i always thought it'd be air pollution that would cause this trend) and, of course, no known medication other than heavy antibioitics.

i'm just astounded that it hasn't really hit the united states yet, which may show how little international travel from here is being done. or how much trouble the airlines actually are in. but it's only a matter of time. so wash your hands and watch out for whoever coughs. and breathe normally. this is scary, but don't lock yourself down.

those of you who have driven by the 404 (route not found) probably think about this all the time when they drive by....

if you worked at a company called cumming cockburn, what kind of phone calls would you receive on a daily basis?

cumming cockburn: "it's not just our name, it's a way of --OMIGOD IT HURTS!!!!!!!"

thanks to marko for reminding me.

i spoke a little while back about chow yun-fat in toronto filming movies, dissing the trailer to bulletproof monk, with obvious scenes from nathan philips square.

i know chow yun-fat's filmed in toronto before, because i disrupted the set of one of his other films.

1998: walking to work from college park to king/yonge. it's late morning (this was one of those internet boom jobs where no one showed up til noon, but stayed until 10pm or later) and i decided to see how much of the walk i could underground through toronto's PATH. i ended up doing this walk during rainy days, but i was still figuring out the right path to take.

after cutting through a strange sub-basement of the bay, i was completely mixed up on where i was. as opposed to backtracking, i took the first set of stairs i found to hopefully get out on the surfaceworld again.

i exit one urine-soaked stairwell through an unmarked door, into the sunlight.

20 people in black leather jackets turn to face me. i stop and quickly look around.

the star asks: will mayor mel lastman step down in november?

i say: about damn time. sure, he was colourful, but pure populism doesn't make for any good long-term planning skills.

for pure entertainment value, he was up there like king kong, but as an elected official, he was a total farce. asking pop groups to re-unite, scared of being boiled alive by cannibals, flip-flopping on every possible issue, threatening fellow elected officials and journalists alike.

florida, he's your's now again, except possibly for good.
take care of him for me, thanks.
<vitriol />

okay kids. this is a simple warning, explaining that upon closer viewing of this entry, you may encounter photos that may disturb you. i merely report on my interactions with the world at large and sometimes i see things that may upset you. occasionally me. not in this specific case, although the idea can sound freaking weird.

what's going on? oh: the emmster (and thusly graig) have a dead hamster in their freezer. and i have a photo.

in the time i've left ontario, some things have changed whilst other facts of life remain constant.

the act of deregulating the provincial electrical power grid was to have lowered prices and help clear up the massive government debt accrued over the years when it controlled the former ontario hydro, which was later broken up into five distinct companies.

however, much like what happened in california last summer, the prices skyrocketed (as predicted by the opposition) and before any rotating brownouts, the tory government finally restored rate caps by placing a freeze on the pricing, putting a deadbolt on yet another very bad idea by the very bad former premier (and the current premier isn't doing that great either).

meanwhile, what hasn't changed is the venerable ttc, still not receiving any additional funding, is looking at another propsed rate increase, this time by 40 cents, which would the largest percentage increase in 10 years. naturally, the transit authorities don't want to do this, but the ability to maintain regular upkeep of all its infrastructure using simply municipal funds is crippling. the new york transit system is looking at their own hike, but there's an organized protest in place to fight any transit increases. hopefully, the big smoke can follow the big apple's lead.

drug fact on allergy medication: marked drowsiness may occur. i have been set sail on uselessness this afternoon, with occasional bouts of token productivity.

aside from the usual warning that "photos will appear later", lomo and otherwise, let's jump into the weekend that just was.

marko and jenny got married this past saturday, so thursday night, i flew and flew back up to the big smoke of toronto.

okee doke.
i'm flew into toronto last night in preparation for a wedding.
picked up by the supercouple and staying at the spider's lair (they're so cute) (the spiders, and the supercouple) since mr. spider stays at the other half's place.

last night: yet another night at the pauper's pub, where i discovered that graig's musical tastes have, um, diversified, which is acceptable, i admit. context establishes many things, but having the lyrics to total eclipse of the heart in the car? i've been away too long.

today: several things to do today, and i'm already starting a bit late. but success is my co-pilot, although the condition of the plane is another matter.

we'll catch up on details later.
now it's shower time and discover which of the local residents might end up as the proverbial the spider waydown the plughole (but only if he/she lived in the bathtub in the first place, see, i'm not cruel. mostly).

marko ran into a bit of fun at work when a garbage truck, the heavy commercial sort with the front-loading action, yanked a power line with the top lid off a nearby post, causing power and traffic disruptions in markham. his workplace lost power for a bit of the morning and he was about 20 minutes away from getting dismissed for the day when the building rerouted its power.

you can see the other photos in his special little directory here.

meanwhile, to cause stomach envy, look at these sample cakes my company got today. of course, with my food allergies, i could only photograph.

let's visit a few cities and see what's striking my chords in the local press:

• chico, california: an interview with the dentist who tinkered on tojo's dentures, masking a morse code message about pearl harbour in the japanese wartime minister's new teeth. remember pearl harbour (yes, yanks, i spell canadian) comes across as the longest-standing prank that strikes as cruel and ironic yet fitting.
• toronto: approval has been granted for a pair of condominium towers to be built by yonge and eligible (er, eglinton, my old stomping grounds). there was a big fracas about this construction for a few years now, considering that 51 storeys exceeds the old height barrier considerably. they mention "twin towers" but since the other one will be 37 storeys, it's more fraternal and identical.
• thunder bay: tomorrow night sees paul shaffer get a street named after him in front of the auditorium. this has been discussed already in the past, but rumours abound that david letterman might show up. i await the accosting of my hometown on late night television.
• fort worth: daisy the burnt dog has healed after a torturous ordeal where a man doused her in gasoline and set her on fire. after extensive surgery, her burns have healed and her fur has regrown and most importantly, she has regained her doggy joie de vivre: playing, sniffing around, being all curious like. the man is appearing in court shortly to answer for this heinous act.
• new york city: um, aside from the usual plenty, yet another blog meetup.

today's cruel site of the day brings us to the big smoke.

as part of an odd campaign whose point eludes me right now, hundreds of fibreglass moose were placed in toronto in 2000. many were painted funny, many were auctioned for charity and many were vandalized to the point that antlerwatch is actively tracking any defaced moose in toronto.

a gleefully pointless exercise for an equally pointless attraction.

speaking of pointless, my life over the past few days may be documented shortly. if i can breathe for a moment.

uh oh.
they're organizing a get-rid-of-me party next thursday.
where do i hide?

i kid, i kid,
it's so so sweet of y'all to do this.
of course, they have 4 replacements,
but hey.
when they tell me i'm special,
they mean it like the special olympics special.

i still kid.

(not a haiku inc.)

a lot of the other gtabloggers have better photos of rannie's birthday, because they apparently have people in the shots. mine are basically toys and signs and things faraway. portraiture was never me, i guess.

anyways, here's evidence of a prior event.
(witty writeups and descriptions available after i finish watching deceiver):

whenever i start my own company, all the employees can effectively pick their own titles and i'd be the chief troublemaker. i'm sure a few months down, hr would have their own say-so, but it'd be a fun few months.

speaking of funning up the place, after a non-motivating day at work where nothing would start properly and everyone was listless, i head with densil to scadding court community centre (dundas + bathurst) where he's taking swiming lessons. we go to the outdoor pool and i bob about in the water giving densil tips on how to swim and he promptly runs out of breath. he's not doing as bad as he thinks and i admire his willingness to learn things he didn't pick up before, like biking, rollerblading and ice skating, to name a few over the past year or so.

the swim was rejuvenating and after picking up the now brakeless bike from work, i zig and zag over to the now lounge, where there's a shindig for rannie's 28th birthday, which is actually on the sunday (same as marko!) but for booking and attendee purposes, it's friday night for the local bloggers union and rannie's offline or lifeful buds. the smokers were outside when i biked up: birthdayman, jay and some others. not too many people yet when i showed, although i was ushered to sit with people already there.

one day after returning, i can detail much mayhem.

one long day. awake slightly earlier (amc showed diabolik: how cool is that? esp. after its weird historical licensing controversy) to complete packing for the early hotel checkout, taxivan to work where the usual last minute stuff surfaces (and free chinese lunch!) whereby everything has to be done before the airport limo picks me and rides the brake like a bicycle pedal. long line at the american airlines checkin counter at laguardia, in front of a dyed-redhead rock chick, looking like franka potente from run lola run with a texas accent and a leopard-print suitcase with a slayer tour pass. find out there's no mailboxes in the airport after a few someones took some planes into some buildings </sarcasm> (psst. check out these exclusive world trade centre cleanup pictures) so i'm left carrying my unmailed postcards and letters again (last time: no stamps no content. progress is a small-footed creature sometimes. after a quick survey, head to the gate.

continuing with our animal theme, cbc news reports that the toronto zoo is currently exploring the possibility of using animal waste as a possible power source. apparently a few european zoos have successfully implemented this and the animals at the toronto zoo apparently generate 1900 tonnes of the smelly shite every year, but it only seems to generate enough power for a building or two. not exactly enough to live off the grid, but it's something anyways.

isn't it a coincidence?

the entire time i'm in new york is the same time that the pope's in toronto for world youth day. i either timed it this way (no) or we just can't be in the same airspace at the same time (secret identity stuff, shhh).

other than hearing friends complaining about the crowded transit and the traffic mayhem, the only evidence i saw were the latin newsbroadcasts on the american stations, the odd sidebar in the new york times and the big mess called downsview the evening after the big pope powwow from my descending airplane (it's called a mass; you'd figure that watching father ted would actually make me remember core parts of catholicism, but no). like a tornado found a paper mill, or my bottom drawer at work. popestock or lolla-pope-looza, i guess, based on all the weird minutia left behind. what did the globe and mail say?

"The two-day Roman Catholic festival in northwest Toronto left behind discarded socks, broken umbrellas, orange peel, melon rind, fragments of candle holders, plastic sheeting, water bottles, religious pamphlets, empty tubes of sunscreen and arthritis cream, and vast expanses of wet cardboard trodden to a pulp."

an aerial photo would've been smart, but my camera was safely stowed in the outofway overhead compartment, and my window to the world was tiny since i managed to get the emergency escape door. oddly enough, with all the times i've flown, this is the first time i've won the seating lottery and got the leggy emergency exit seat. also odd is that i received no instructions on how the door worked from the flight attendant, leaving me to wonder during the occasional bouts of turbulence felt during the laguardia to pearson quick flight how the door actually worked and what armed meant. it was disarmed on landing (or unarmed, the buttons weren't clear) by one of the crew, but couldn't that explosive capability be manipulated by a passenger? and why did my seat smell like pine trees twice? did santa get sucked into the engine?

other than that, i fly well. sure, the children have their belief systems shattered (like my usual "i know elvis is dead; saw him get hit by a car last week" schtick), but i read my paper, screw up the crossword and re-encrypt the cryptograms like i do whilst actively tracking each passing metre in the air. i guess i'm lucky to have missed all the papal excitement, but i like the idea that a shared faith, especially amongst the youth, would have them converge where i live.

well, since i'm back in the big smoke, i guess it's not much of a travelogue after all, is it? i went and became all busy actually walking around doing stuff rather than update this meagre space. central park, guggenheim, fao schwartz, united nations. bah! who has time? especially idiotman who walked the entire time.

i'll regale details and the damn photos later. needless to say, it's humid and hot in both cities, albeit there's more greenspace here, and no billboards on every possible vertically capable square centimetre of wallspace, but where are the buildings?

i'll get my head straightend at work tomorrow then. but, i may be going back shortly. i'll keep y'all informed. okay, whoever finds this message.

TOP FIVE things i missed about toronto

1. level roads and sidewalks with no craters or weird bumps on them (although, once i hit spadina, i'll find my share again).
2. multicoloured money and change people actually accept.
3. those fully grown tree things that grow everywhere and not just one big space.
4. good dairy products, and a few other raw ingredients, like [i like it when i leave my thoughts unfinished. --gak] vegetables and chicken (yeah, raw chicken just isn't the same between canada and the u.s., but it tastes fatter stateside).
5. my humble bicycle. or, maybe based on all the walking i did, my feet. whatever.

TOP FIVE things i miss already about new york city

1. pizza and bagels and the cornerstores with delis and beer at your disposal. eat like a king for cheap.
2. skyscrapers or other things that seem to stalk you wherever you go.
3. red bull. man, that's like 3 ginseng teas to the wakeup motor. beats caffeine as a stimulant, but then again, they're not allowed in canada for some reason. (must search, but later).
4. girls who find it rude when you don't approach them, rather than toronto's general "rude that you exist" modus operandi.
5. a sense of identity, that what you stand on has brought you to this level and now it's time for you to shape things. the compelling architecture, the quest for newness, those damn bums in the next neighbourhood over ...all this adds up to a feeling of understanding your elders and keeping real to do something good.

meanwhile ...in less horsepucky land,
WHY HAS JOHNNY FORSAKEN ME??
(or, why was johnny's original charbroiled hambrugers closed this sunday evening? sure, i didn't look past the padlocked grate fence, but wtf? i have to wander by again, or however wandering 10 km away from me goes.)

this is a test message, just to measure apperances, length, verbosity, monstrosity. this personal publishing system looks really cool and I want to play with it. so, here's a brief bit i emailed to brad and spoke to graig about.