".....whooo is this?" is just one of things i say a lot, but it's all based on a strange call i received over a year ago.

normally, before i'd answer the phone, i'd check the call display on the cordful unit to see whether i know the caller and whether i feel like looking at the voice mail light blink repeatedly (sometimes, it's really a choice between do i want to talk to you? or do i really want to have to check voice mail afterwards?, which makes me the most pleasantly social telephone participant this earth has ever faced (don't worry; the prospect of clearing the call history in order to see the time again on the display made every phone call an exasperating chore)). however, this whimsical weekend evening, early with the summer light, i just grabbed the cordless phone and blindly walked into this conversation:

me: hello?
older man with accent: [pause] hhhhhhhhello? [all the H's are really phlegmmy.]
[nonplussed] hi.
hhhhello.
[curiosity setting in] hi, who is this?
hhhhhelllo?
graig, is that you?
.....whooo is this?
[ok, it's not a prank call after all] um, hi?
.....whooo is this?
um, gary.
.....keh-rrrrey.
[patience dropping] yeah gary. who's calling?
.....whoooo's gary?
i think you have the wrong number.
.....whoooo is this?
wrong. number.
.....rrron? hhhhelllo?
[exasperation setting in] no, this is gary. who are you?
.....whooo is this?
look: you dialed a wrong number. who are you?
.....whaaat?
who are you? *sigh* who are you looking for?
.....whaaaat?
who is the person you are trying to call?
.....hhhi. is emelia there?
there's no one by that name here.
.....no?
no. no emelia.
.....ohhh.
yeah. goodbye.
[click]

the phone then rang 30 seconds later and i let that go. no voice mail light went on, although i finally did check the number, trying to remember how to do a phone number block.

incidentally, a younger woman from that same number called two days later. i know this because, again, i didn't screen the number first and picked up the old school blind method. she was looking for the same person, but she was able to understand in well under 2 minutes that this was a wrong number. i asked about the old guy, but she just apologized and hung up.

i think i had an old florist number at the time, but i couldn't prove it. but still, when i tell this story out, i can do the old guy's voice perfectly, so i started calling people i knew asking ".....whooo is this?". and they knew it was me.

fin.